Somewhere over da rainbow

the break-up

2008-10-21T21:59:00.002+08:00

I should hv known that he doesnt love me... it's jz because no1 else but I love him so much...

I should hv believed what books say about situations similar to our relationship...

And I should also believed in what people say about when to break up...

There's no such things like 'too busy to call'...

There's no such things like 'sms alr but u nvr reply'... if I were u, I would call to check if everything's ok no matter how busy...

There's no such things like keeping me waiting all the times... Not just 10, 15 minutes... It's a few hours... not only at my hse... at school... outside... everywhere I have to wait, wait and wait more... and he turns up with no apologies... If I'm 'lucky' enough, he will even shout at me...

There's no such things like 'I don't want to talk to you'...

There's no such things like 'I can't communicate with you'...

There's no such things like 'At school, do work or pack up or wadever, so busy so cannot talk to you'....

There's no such things like 'At home, ah ma dun like me to talk on the phone with you...'

There's no such things like 'Online, sorry dear... i'm editting... so i still cannot talk to you...'

They say if you love someone, you can't bear to see ur beloved one cry...

He's the one that seems to feel irritate when my heart hurts until I cry...

He's the one that cuts off the phone if he finds that he dunno how to answer...

He's the one that is able to push me, pull me, suffocate me in the public...

He's the one that can fall asleep when talking to me on the phone even when I'm crying...

He's the one that can just let me go home alone coz he needs to rush to meet his friends...

He's the one that dun like to let people know that I'm his gf... I must be hidden like an unknown object...

He's the one that can let his friends criticise about the gf anyhow...

He's the one that can talk, but cannot do... Baby don't promise, don't boast... I rmb you said you would make my bday this year much better than what you could do for me last year...
Truly, this year, you couldn't do anything to celebrate what...
It doesn't matter if we cant celebrate it nicely... I'm just saying that as an example of your daily promises...

You think I meet you just to get the paper my friend ask me to print?
If it costs me a few hours waiting, I wouldn't bother asking for your help.
You know how much I long to meet you.
But, dear ah... not even a hug did u give me.

I was very disappointed and I felt like something was stuck in my throat... I don't want to say so much about this problem because I know next time, you will still be late as usual. You yourself can't change. Should I speak too much just to worsen our relationship?

I do believe in fate. But I also do believe in selves.
Fate brought us together. But our relationship needs both of us to fertilise it... to take care of it... to bring it up...

I can understand you are busy. But I don't understand why there're so many why's that you cannot answer me.

I'm willing to accompany you but is a girl supposed to do so? Maybe yes, in our relationship.

But dear ah, I also could find out that you weren't THAT busy. I was there, and I know it's just that you totally forget about me... you don't really care about sms-ing or calling me...

You might question why it is to important to me if you call me or not.

I can answer you why, because I love you. And because you don't love me, you don't understand love's basic needs...

I do love you a lot. But ur hurting so much... And I dunno when you will understand me... and I dunno how long I have to suffer this pain...

Dear ah... if you do love me, please show me your love.
If you don't, just leave me... like you never meet me before...

2008-10-16T01:07:00.001+08:00

baby... i'm always by ur side... being ur ears... ur eyes... n ur helping hands...
zhi dao mah?

2008-10-10T00:01:00.003+08:00

today we managed to meet at night...
dear was back from school, exhausted - as usual =(

... umm ummm... hmmm... hmm

we tried something new... haha it was very funny XD and sick too...
we both were almost vomiting already :">

Love and Miss dear lots lots....

2008-10-08T01:04:00.001+08:00

Khanh Huong: dear's eyes, nose, mouth, hand, legs, feet, toes, fingers oso nice
Khanh Huong: everything of dear is so cute 2 me
Jason Ng: bk
Jason Ng: awwwwwww :"
Jason Ng: dear also mah
Jason Ng: come to think of it
Jason Ng: it was fate that brought us tgt
Jason Ng: it was fate that made me kiss u on the very 1st day
Jason Ng: and it was fate that both of us are cute
Jason Ng: fate make us argue and scream so that we'll learn
Jason Ng: and thus, i say 'I Love You, Emy Chu Khanh Huong very very much'

I must treasure this conversation... dear seldom talks like this...

Dear ah... i do love dear deeply, truly and madly <3

hey bitch

2008-10-06T16:53:00.002+08:00

i nvr ever hated anyone in my life... The highest level could be "dislike" but no more than that!!!!!

BUT NOW some1 has really really got on my nerves.... pissed me off... n made me frustrated whenever, wherever, however, wadever I think abt that bee-otch...

Hope things should go on smoothly...

To Guan Ying: financially and mentally im being tortured... pls help me!

To someone special: the more difficult life is, the more i love u... but for u, its the other way round...

To myself: What cant kill you makes u stronger... ganbatte!

2008-02-06T02:04:00.001+08:00

bk in vietnam alr :DDD

first thing first, let me blog abt how happy i am bk in vietnam

^this is wad i ate this afternoon, 3 bowls of it :D it was so tasty eh, it was smth abt bee hoon, with fish cake, meat and alot of other things :D

then this is wad i ate for this morning, 1/2 a chicken with her own eggs too >___<>
alright, gtg sleep alr, eyes getting too heavy @____@ nights all XD

my fridge ^ XD

4 my dearest

2008-01-07T04:09:00.000+08:00

i cooked smth 4 kutie today....
Fresh Spring Rolls O_o quite a lot
dis 1 i took....
n dis 1 kutie took...
which 1's better hehe?
And... chicken wings deep fried in fish sauce... i forgot to take pic of dis 1 :)

Dunno y i could make this meal better than ever b4... keke...
Hope kutie liked it.... *muacks*

2007-12-09T22:43:00.000+08:00

panic panic... tmr is the MKT examination alr
T______T

everything burns

This one is for my boi... <3

It was just tat i felt lonely n couldnt study anything... sorry abt ytd :(

sick

2007-11-22T02:53:00.000+08:00

im sick... i've a headache... i cant sleep... kutie always keeps me waiting :(
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

SICK

^^

2007-11-20T00:59:00.000+08:00

i dun wanna see u cry.... i l<3ve ya kutie... h@ppy birthd@y once again :)

happy birthday

2007-11-19T00:32:00.000+08:00

Spent time wif kutie just now at Pasta Mania @ Parkway Parade... <3
Then got on bus to Pasir Ris - train to Tampines - then bus bk to his skul :)
It was 00:01 then so it's kutie's bd alr... yea!!!!
*muacks*

Friday nite

2007-11-16T23:57:00.000+08:00

Nobody wanna see us together
But it don't matter no
Cause I got you babe
Nobody wanna see us together
But it don't matter no
Cause I got you
Cause we gon' fight
Oh yes we gon' fight(We gon' fight)
Believe we gon' fight(We gon' fight)

Had a long talk with kutie on the phone...
He seems crazy when he's sleepy.... but super cute to me <3
Wo ai ni, wo xiang ni, my dear...

2007-11-16T02:21:00.000+08:00

I had a nightmare... >_____<
Wad's happening 2 me these days ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh????

Anw, 2day i could meet kutie... and met his lil sis Vivi too... she's cute... I wish my mom would let me dye my hair like hers... =="

After meeting him, went home... while showering, suddenly i tot abt this song
"too late to apologize"
... in love wif it alr :">

buồn

2007-11-15T02:18:00.001+08:00

Y do I have to suffer all of these fcukin stupid things???
I feel stressed... I feel crazy...

I want to go home...
I want my mom...
I want my brother...
I want my frens...
I want to take in architecture... one day...
Something's missing in my heart

This is the song which I sang with my classmate in University of Architecture in VN.... hehe a bit weird >______<

bad mood

2007-11-13T01:02:00.000+08:00

everything weird started to happen from this morning...
kutie tried to wake up me twice but i didnt get up and even didnt rmb that he did... so i was late for school...
my "brain was still sleeping" [jason said] so i didnt realise my bus come and go away rite in front of my eyes... so, no choice, had to w8 4 the next bus >.<
Suddenly my classroom was changed, which means i had to climb one more floor up @____@... the new room was damn cold. It's rather small but got 4 air-cons ~brbrbr~
The new lecturer is boring... he teaches but i feel like he's singing a lullaby for me to sleep... and i couldnt count how many times he says "OK" per 1 minute...
I tot marketing should be an interesting module... but the teacher's a lullaby singer... and the book is super big and thick, and of coz damn heavy.......... ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh *faints*
Then finally, was released from school... went home with a status of "eyes closed, empty mind, and empty stomach"... but i didnt feel like eating anything, so went straight to home, and was thinking abt a good rest...
My roommate had kindly prepared a nice meal for me but i ate only a little bit... then had to went to the nearest DBS to open an acc. Arghh, my classmate didnt rmb well so she tot a std pass with only 2 mths left still can make a DBS card... omg... i walked a long way [though it was nt really long, but i was sleepy ah] to find the DBS bank, then had to queue, then asked them but to receive the big big "NO, U CANT"... SH!T
Then returned home... home sweet home... i just wanted my bed only...
But when i got home... my com had finished downloading "Lust, Caution" alr... I tried to extract the .rar file but it needed password... to have password, i had to sign in a website... to follow some instructions... and finally to receive NO PASSWORD at all! @____________@
No! I couldnt give up after such efforts! So i tried to be a "hacker" once... keke... my fren helped me a bit... the rest i had to do by myself... but when i finished everything, the last to do was jz a click... OMG... it said... windows cannot open this file... i tried clicking it many times over and over again [like a crazy one]... of coz the computer still said the same thing ah... *sobs*
I suddenly wanted to read the conversations between kutie and me when we jz knew each other for a few days... he's so cute... we were funny... i missed him...
wtf... i tried to call him but i couldnt... always heard "the SingTel mobile customer is now not available. Please try again later"... then i tried to call him with the home phone... phew... finally i could hear his voice "hello".... :">
I met him for awhile. He seemed tired. So he couldnt help me have any motivation but worries.
After that, went home and slept... hoho finally i could sleep...
but i had an empty mind when got up... dunno wad i want... dunno wad i think... dunno where i go... dunno.... dunno... i dunno...
while i was feeling insane... kutie kept talking abt wad to eat and his stomachache... and if tmr he should go to skul... >______< I had no mood to talk to him... i wasnt myself... i sometimes felt like exploding... ahhhhhh.... wad happens to me?

phewwwwwwwww... finally, when kutie went to sleep alr... when im alone... when the whole world's sleeping... i can hear every single sound... peaceful... quiet... i'm ok alr... *yawns*.... tmr it's gonna be ok... hehe
I hope i'll appear in kutie's dreams... i hope he'll in mine too... :">
love ya lots <3

fun fun fun Friday ^^

2007-11-10T03:44:00.000+08:00

hmmm...
Finally i could get over my Tourism exam, keke though it was nt really good... coz i couldnt rmb some points which i did memorize well alr... hicc...
anw, still "BRAVOOOOOOO!!!" coz I can be free for a few days ^^

Met kutie twice today...
I realised i feel more and more bored with eating
kutie!!!!!! save sweetieeeee ah! i lost 2 kilos so far alr... I want to be a like before ah

Though I almost had nothing to do except eating and watching how they made "Transformers" with kutie, it was fun... I was really surprised... it's incredible!
kutie was busy with his hw ah... but as long as we're tgt... i'm happy alr....

I dun rmb exactly when we left Hong Kong Cafe... but when i got home, it was almost 3AM @___@ ... wasnt sleepy... awww my bad habit....... time to train myself to sleep earlier alr

kutie kept saying thanks to me for accompanying him 2day... >.<

i also thank kutie for spending time with me.... and for.....:"> loving me....

it's drizzling, which makes sweetie miss the time when we walked in the rain tgt....
I love you, kutie ah

Quelque chose dans mon coeur <3

2007-11-09T01:21:00.000+08:00

now that kutie made this blog for me, so i should write something ah
1. abit stressed today coz i had to go through 13 chapters...
then, was thinking abt kutie's number ♫•♥13 ♫•♥ [...praying i'll be lucky in the exam...]

2. though i could met kutie only for a short while jz now, but now im feeling more blissful alr

i got abit crazy after meeting him, so i tried to fool kutie on Y!M... hehe
it seems that he often loses in my jokes... which is very cute cute cute cute to sweetie

shagua: now i know ur mind got prob
shagua: Emy's waiting for u in the mental hospital ah
shagua: go join with her

bendan: *crying*
bendan: *nt talking*

shagua: Emy's crying alr
shagua: her bf dun want to go with her

bendan: i will rescue her from mental hospital

shagua: *surprised*
shagua: whoa....
shagua: ur absolutely a mental patient

bendan: no i'm not

shagua: who loves a crazy girl is also crazy mah

bendan: u are NOT crazy

shagua: then y emy's in mental hospital?

bendan: if u are in mental hospital, then u dun need to take exam alr

shagua: then who said he would rescue emy from mental hospital?
shagua: im confused alr

bendan: me ah of course

thanks kutie for answering my stupid questions keke... i love ya lots!

muacks xie xie kutie lots <3

2007-11-08T03:21:00.001+08:00

Kutie's 1st post in Sweetie's blog : DDD