Tuesday, October 2110/21/2008 09:59:00 PM
I should hv known that he doesnt love me... it's jz because no1 else but I love him so much...
I should hv believed what books say about situations similar to our relationship...
And I should also believed in what people say about when to break up...
There's no such things like 'too busy to call'...
There's no such things like 'sms alr but u nvr reply'... if I were u, I would call to check if everything's ok no matter how busy...
There's no such things like keeping me waiting all the times... Not just 10, 15 minutes... It's a few hours... not only at my hse... at school... outside... everywhere I have to wait, wait and wait more... and he turns up with no apologies... If I'm 'lucky' enough, he will even shout at me...
There's no such things like 'I don't want to talk to you'...
There's no such things like 'I can't communicate with you'...
There's no such things like 'At school, do work or pack up or wadever, so busy so cannot talk to you'....
There's no such things like 'At home, ah ma dun like me to talk on the phone with you...'
There's no such things like 'Online, sorry dear... i'm editting... so i still cannot talk to you...'
They say if you love someone, you can't bear to see ur beloved one cry...
He's the one that seems to feel irritate when my heart hurts until I cry...
He's the one that cuts off the phone if he finds that he dunno how to answer...
He's the one that is able to push me, pull me, suffocate me in the public...
He's the one that can fall asleep when talking to me on the phone even when I'm crying...
He's the one that can just let me go home alone coz he needs to rush to meet his friends...
He's the one that dun like to let people know that I'm his gf... I must be hidden like an unknown object...
He's the one that can let his friends criticise about the gf anyhow...
He's the one that can talk, but cannot do... Baby don't promise, don't boast... I rmb you said you would make my bday this year much better than what you could do for me last year...
Truly, this year, you couldn't do anything to celebrate what...
It doesn't matter if we cant celebrate it nicely... I'm just saying that as an example of your daily promises...
You think I meet you just to get the paper my friend ask me to print?
If it costs me a few hours waiting, I wouldn't bother asking for your help.
You know how much I long to meet you.
But, dear ah... not even a hug did u give me.
I was very disappointed and I felt like something was stuck in my throat... I don't want to say so much about this problem because I know next time, you will still be late as usual. You yourself can't change. Should I speak too much just to worsen our relationship?
I do believe in fate. But I also do believe in selves.
Fate brought us together. But our relationship needs both of us to fertilise it... to take care of it... to bring it up...
I can understand you are busy. But I don't understand why there're so many why's that you cannot answer me.
I'm willing to accompany you but is a girl supposed to do so? Maybe yes, in our relationship.
But dear ah, I also could find out that you weren't THAT busy. I was there, and I know it's just that you totally forget about me... you don't really care about sms-ing or calling me...
You might question why it is to important to me if you call me or not.
I can answer you why, because I love you. And because you don't love me, you don't understand love's basic needs...
I do love you a lot. But ur hurting so much... And I dunno when you will understand me... and I dunno how long I have to suffer this pain...
Dear ah... if you do love me, please show me your love.
If you don't, just leave me... like you never meet me before...
s0m3wh3r3 0v3r da rainb0w
